Breaking Cycles Without Breaking Connection

Breaking Cycles Without Breaking Connection-
Healing ancestral pain without rejecting where you come from.

It's a fine line, a dance, the ability to listen, feel, and respond.

Oftentimes, we lean into extremes of right or wrong. There’s a perception of comfort when we think we know something unequivocally, without doubt. But very little actually exists in the extremes. The reality is that life is far more grey - or, more accurately, a multitude of shades and colours. Layers of depth. Complex, living, breathing, and infinitely more interesting than any fixed idea of how something should be.

What often happens is that we witness a family member's behaviour and judge it on a surface level, without understanding the experiences that created it. And we react - rejecting not just the behaviour, but the person themselves. These overcorrections don’t save us from unhealthy emotional responses, or from being abused or manipulated. In fact, they can lead us into those very possibilities. When we reject something in totality, we fail to understand the bigger picture. And we reject the good that is within it.

If a parent seemed emotionally or communicatively withholding, we may overcorrect, sharing too much, living without healthy boundaries.

If we felt competition with a sibling, the inclination might be to keep competing… or to give up completely. Conflict or resignation.

If we disagree with political or philosophical points of view held or expressed by our ancestors, we might swing to the opposite, often beyond what truly resides within our heart.

The truth is, you can find resonance in the deeper layers of being, while still choosing to speak or behave differently.

You may not want to follow your family's religion, but can appreciate the devotion to a calling or higher power.

You may choose to vote differently, but understand that each of us is operating from a desire to protect what feels meaningful and important.

You may speak up where they could not, and recognise that you now have an opportunity they didn’t.

You can break patterns of suffering, pain, shame, abuse, addiction - without cutting yourself off from the lineage that welcomed you in, supported you, and nourished your growth (even if only on a spiritual or energetic level).

You can call yourself back from the edge of the extreme, and find where there is resonance, love, care, and support within the family line.

Over the coming days, I encourage you to meditate on the following:

• What do my ancestors value or believe that I could gain a higher perspective on? Is there more resonance than I’ve previously recognised?

• How have their painful experiences shaped their beliefs and behaviours? Could I heal that within me, and respond in a new way?

• What foundations have they built that I could continue, in my own way?

• What strengths, wisdom, or gifts would I love to embody, to enhance my own life experience?

You have more in common with them than you think, and in the very best ways. Soften your reaction, and allow yourself to witness and understand the goodness within, in new ways.

Sending you, and your ancestors, blessings for deeper connection and higher understanding. 

-Jennifer

Our Ancestral Wisdom, Guidance, + Gifts weekend event is rapidly approaching. Join us for 2 days of meditation, space to witness, deep healing of the unconscious, and fresh eyes to see the world. There are options to come yourself, or with a friend. I'd love to work with you and your ancestral line! Learn more HERE